A headline exists that wants you to ask seven questions before hiring a debt settlement company. Seven. Not six. Not eight. Someone sat in a conference room and decided the exact number of questions standing between you and financial ruin is seven.
The premise assumes you're capable of vetting a debt settlement company. You can't vet a plumber. You hired someone off Craigslist who flooded your basement and stole your catalytic converter. But sure, you'll suddenly develop due diligence skills when a company offers to negotiate with Discover on your behalf for a modest fee of everything you own.
Debt settlement companies are not in the business of settling your debt. They're in the business of convincing you that settling your debt is something you can't do yourself. Which is true. Because if you could negotiate with creditors, you wouldn't have seventeen maxed-out credit cards and a payday loan secured against your nephew's PlayStation.
The article helpfully notes that not every debt settlement company is legit. Breathtaking insight. Next they'll reveal that not every guy selling Rolexes out of a duffel bag at the bus station is an authorized dealer.
Here's the real question. If you need to ask seven questions to determine whether a company is legitimate, the company is not legitimate. Legitimate businesses don't require a quiz. You don't walk into a Walgreens and interrogate the pharmacist about whether the Advil is actually Advil.
But you'll ask the questions anyway. You'll nod along as some guy named Brett explains their proprietary debt negotiation strategy. You'll sign the contract. You'll pay the fees. And six months later you'll have less money and the same debt, except now it's got late fees compounding like a mortgage-backed security in 2007.
The only thing getting settled here is your net worth at zero.
Photo by Towfiqu barbhuiya on Unsplash
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