The personal finance industry published a flowchart for people drowning in debt. The same people who financed a jet ski at 19% APR.
This is the target demographic. Credit card balances they can't explain. Auto loans on vehicles worth half the principal. A Klarna account for protein powder. And now we're handing them a decision tree with conditional branches.
The flowchart asks if you have disposable income. Sir, you bought a timeshare in Branson. The concept of disposable income left your life in 2019.
It offers three paths. Credit counselor. Debt relief company. DIY approach. The third option is for people who created spreadsheets before they created problems. Those people are not reading flowcharts about debt. They're refinancing mortgages at 4am for fun.
The debt relief company path is my favorite. It's marketed to people who believe someone else will negotiate their Discover Card balance down to thirty cents on the dollar. As if Capital One has a feelings department.
The credit counselor route sounds responsible until you realize it's just someone else telling you to stop buying things. You're paying for advice your brother-in-law gives you for free every Thanksgiving.
The flowchart contains a box labeled "Can you afford minimum payments?" If the answer is yes, you don't need a flowchart. You need a calendar reminder. If the answer is no, the flowchart can't help you. You need a second job or a rich aunt.
Somewhere a 24-year-old with $47,000 in personal loans is staring at this chart. Trying to figure out which branch applies to him. He's tracing the arrows with his finger. He financed the phone he's using to view the chart.
Photo by Towfiqu barbhuiya on Unsplash
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