Seniors Gain Access to Drugs They Can't Afford Anyway

Medicare will now cover obesity drugs. The government decided seniors can have the expensive injections that make them less hungry. Novo Nordisk and Eli Lilly shareholders just felt a tingle they haven't experienced since their last quarterly earnings beat.

Millions of new patients unlocked. That's the phrase here. Like they were trapped in a dungeon waiting for the federal government to turn the key. They weren't locked out by policy. They were locked out by the part where a month's supply costs more than their mortgage payment. But sure, coverage changes everything.

Here's what patients should know. You still have a copay. It's not free. The insurance company will cover some percentage of a four-figure monthly bill and you'll cover the rest. Then you'll inject yourself weekly while eating smaller portions of the same food you've been eating for sixty years. Revolutionary.

Retail traders saw this headline and bought calls on both companies. They did not read past the headline. They do not know what a formulary is. They do not know what prior authorization means. They think Medicare coverage equals infinite demand equals stock goes up equals they finally beat the market. They will lose money by Friday.

The move expands access. Access is a funny word. It used to mean you could get something. Now it means you can technically get something if you navigate a system designed by people who get bonuses for denying claims. But the press release says access, so we'll call it access.

Novo Nordisk and Eli Lilly will add this to their investor presentation. They'll project revenue growth based on the entire Medicare-eligible population becoming patients. Analysts will nod and raise price targets. The stocks will gap up for three days. Then everyone will remember that reimbursement rates exist and margins matter.

Congratulations to every senior citizen who now qualifies for a drug they'll quit taking after two months because the side effects make them nauseous and the cost makes them broke.

Photo by Diana Polekhina on Unsplash