Serena Williams is 44 years old and will play singles at Wimbledon via wild card. Wild card. The tennis term for "we need you more than you need us."
She hasn't won a major since 2017. That's nine years ago. The last time she hoisted a trophy, retail traders were still pretending they understood blockchain.
Wimbledon handed her a free pass into the tournament because ticket sales matter more than competitive integrity. Venus got one too for doubles. The Williams sisters will shuffle around on grass while actual qualifiers who spent months grinding through challenger events watch from the locker room. Those players earned their spots by winning matches. Serena earned hers by existing.
This is the same energy as giving a washed-up day trader a funded account because he was profitable in 2015. Nobody cares that you made money when Apple was $28. Your Robinhood account is down 67% and you're asking your nephew to explain what a stop loss is.
The All England Club looked at their spreadsheet and realized they could sell more strawberries and cream if a famous person showed up. So they bent the rules. They called it a wild card. They could have called it what it is: a marketing stunt with a dress code.
Venus and Serena will lose in the first round of doubles to a pair of 23-year-olds from Belarus nobody's heard of. The crowd will clap politely. The commentators will say something about legacy and grace. Then everyone will move on.
Serena's career Grand Slam total is 23. Her ranking is somewhere below "unseeded." But sure, let's give her the spot that could've gone to someone who's actually been playing tennis this decade instead of launching venture capital funds and sitting courtside at Lakers games.
She'll collect her participation trophy and Wimbledon will collect their nostalgia revenue, which is the only asset class performing worse than her backhand.
Photo by Jeff Cadestin on Unsplash
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