Josh D'Amaro stood in front of cameras and told CNBC that Disney parks performed well last quarter. Surprised everyone by revealing that the theme park company's theme parks made money. Probably workshopped that soundbite for weeks with six consultants who bill $400 an hour.
The parks were a "big surprise." The facilities that charge $159 per ticket and $17 for a turkey leg somehow generated revenue. Truly stunning development from the division that's been printing cash since 1955. D'Amaro's next interview will reveal that Mickey Mouse remains popular and children enjoy cartoon characters.
His strategy centers on storytelling, intellectual property, and technology. Three things Disney has never considered before in its 103-year history. Retail traders heard "storytelling" and immediately bought calls because they think it means the company will make movies. Disney makes movies. Disney has always made movies. You're buying shares in a movie company because the CEO said they'll focus on the thing they do.
The company now has "clarity" and "stability." Translation: we've stopped actively lighting money on fire for three consecutive months. Wall Street analysts will upgrade the stock based on management's ability to describe their business using two abstract nouns. Some guy in New Jersey just put his kid's college fund into DIS because the CEO used the word "clarity" and he thinks that means something.
D'Amaro replaced Bob Iger after Iger replaced Bob Chapek after Iger replaced himself the first time. Disney has changed CEOs more often than most people change their oil and each one discovers the exact same strategy: own popular characters and charge money to see them. Revolutionary stuff.
The real surprise is that anyone found parks performing well remotely surprising. Families didn't stop existing. Children didn't stop wanting overpriced mouse-shaped food. Physics didn't change. Roller coasters still work the same way they did last quarter when apparently nobody could've predicted people would pay to ride them.
Photo by Aditya Vyas on Unsplash
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