Kathryn Ruemmler testified before the House that Jeffrey Epstein was a masterful liar who exploited her to boost his credibility. Bold defense. The man can't respond because he's dead in a cell under circumstances we're definitely not allowed to question. Perfect time to call him manipulative.
She left Goldman Sachs in June after her emails with Epstein became public. The emails were bad enough that a bank which survived 2008, Malaysia's 1MDB scandal, and Marcus decided she had to go. That's genuinely impressive. Goldman has the ethical flexibility of a yoga instructor on Xanax, but even they drew a line.
Ruemmler says Epstein used her name to bolster his standing. The former top lawyer at Goldman Sachs—a firm whose standing includes "helped collapse the global economy" and "paid $5 billion in fines since 2000"—was somehow the reputational boost a convicted sex offender needed. Really makes you think about what circles value Goldman's endorsement.
She called him masterful. That's the word. Masterful. Not manipulative. Not deceptive. Masterful. Like he was a craftsman. A real artisan of lying. You can almost see the Yelp review: "Five stars. Jeffrey lied to me with such skill and panache I didn't even notice until the subpoena arrived."
The technical setup here is flawless. Resistance at "accepting responsibility" holds firm. Support at "I'm the real victim" remains unbroken. RSI indicates peak deflection. MACD shows a golden cross between "bad judgment" and "he tricked me." Chart says she's going higher.
Retail traders are frantically Googling whether this affects Goldman's stock price, as if the market gives a f*ck about anything that happened before last quarter's earnings. Spoiler: it doesn't. GS is up because interest rates did a thing. Your conspiracy theories about executive departures don't move ticks.
Epstein was a masterful liar, but apparently not masterful enough to trick her into declining his dinner invitations.
Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash
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