Nvidia now runs a dating service for computers. The company connects people who bought too many GPUs with Scandinavian warehouse owners who have cheap electricity. This is what happens when you dominate a market so completely that your actual job description stops making sense.
The Nordics have land and power. GPU buyers have desperation and quarterly earnings calls to justify. Nvidia figured out it could just introduce them and collect a fee for standing there. It's the world's most profitable blind date setup, except instead of dinner and a movie, it's racks of processors burning through enough kilowatts to power a small European nation.
Sources told CNBC this is happening. Those sources work at companies currently begging Nvidia for chips while also pretending they have leverage in the relationship. They don't. Nvidia could tell them to build their data centers in the Arctic Ocean and they'd ask if wetsuits come in bulk.
The AI infrastructure boom continues because nobody learned anything from the last infrastructure boom or the one before that. Retail traders see "AI data center deals" and hear "mortgage-backed securities" but in a good way this time. They'll buy shares in anything with Nordic in the name, convinced that Sweden's power grid is somehow their ticket to generational wealth.
Cheap power attracts data centers the way cheap rent attracts failed startups. Both end badly, but at least the data centers produce heat you can measure. The region's getting flooded with server farms that'll hum along beautifully until the AI bubble pops and someone has to explain to Norwegian taxpayers why there's a warehouse full of dark GPUs sitting next to a fjord.
Nvidia's not even selling anything here. They're just pointing. That's the business model. Point at Finland, collect margin.
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