Seven million American children now have Trump Accounts. The Treasury Department counted them. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent called this "the most successful launch in government history," which makes sense if you forget about Social Security, Medicare, and the entire New Deal.
The government opened investment accounts for kids who cannot read. Kids who eat crayons. Kids who think the stock market is where you buy livestock. But sure, let's get them started early on wealth accumulation. Nothing builds character like watching your portfolio tank before you lose your first tooth.
Bessent measured success by signup numbers. Not returns. Not financial literacy outcomes. Not whether a single parent understood the fee structure. Just how many names got entered into a database. By that metric, every spam email list in history was also a massive success.
The accounts are for children, which means the parents control them. The same parents who bought GameStop at $347. The same parents who think Bitcoin is a retirement strategy. The same parents who get their financial advice from podcast hosts who sold them gold coins during commercial breaks. Those parents now manage government-sponsored investment accounts for the next generation.
This is wealth-building for toddlers. Tax-advantaged savings for people who cannot tie their shoes. A retirement head start for citizens who think retirement means staying up past bedtime. The government looked at Americans' financial decision-making skills and decided the solution was to start them younger.
Seven million signups in however many weeks this took. That's the victory. That's what makes history. Not the outcome, just the participation. Congratulations to everyone involved. You got parents to fill out paperwork. The hardest part of investing is behind us now.
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