Monday delivered eight analyst calls. Nvidia got one. Netflix got one. AMD got one. First Solar got one. Micron got one. Sandisk got one. T-Mobile got one. The word "more" implies additional companies also received opinions from people whose track records remain conveniently unexamined.
Some guy at a bank changed a rating. Another guy at a different bank changed a price target. A third guy probably upgraded something while downgrading something else to maintain the appearance of objectivity. None of this information will help you. All of it will be contradicted by Wednesday.
Retail traders will read these calls. They will feel informed. They will open their brokerage apps and execute trades based on the institutional equivalent of a Yelp review. The analysts who made these calls have already moved on. They are not thinking about you. They are not worried about your position. They upgraded Nvidia or they downgraded Nvidia and either way they still get paid while you refresh your portfolio balance like a gambling addict checking lottery numbers.
The beautiful part is that by next Monday there will be eight more calls. Different companies. Different ratings. Same irrelevance. The cycle continues because the cycle must continue. If analysts stopped making calls, retail traders might realize they could just buy an index fund and spend their Mondays doing literally anything else.
But they will not realize that. They will read Tuesday's calls. They will read Wednesday's calls. They will adjust their positions accordingly and wonder why they are still broke by Friday.
The analysts will be fine though. They always are.
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