Jamie Dimon sat down with CNBC to discuss the 2028 Olympics partnership. Nobody asked him about the Olympics. They asked him about AI data centers instead. He said he's not worried about the boom fizzling out.
This matters because Jamie Dimon runs a bank that finances these things. When your business model depends on loaning money to companies building giant electricity-sucking warehouses in the desert, you develop opinions about whether those warehouses will keep getting built. Shocking that his opinion is yes.
The CEO of JPMorgan Chase saying he's bullish on AI infrastructure is like the CEO of Marlboro saying he's bullish on lung capacity. The incentive structure writes the headline before the interview starts.
Retail traders will read this and think they've discovered alpha. They'll buy shares of whatever data center REIT their cousin mentioned at Thanksgiving. They'll check the price every eleven minutes. They'll create a Discord server called Data Center Dads. They'll lose money in ways their grandchildren will study in economics classes.
Dimon also shared his thoughts on Federal Reserve Chairman Warsh. Warsh isn't the Fed Chairman yet. Dimon commented on a hypothetical person's hypothetical job performance. CNBC aired it anyway. This is what passes for market-moving information in 2026.
The 2028 Olympics will feature breaking, surfing, and skateboarding. JPMorgan will sponsor all of it. The bank that survived the 2008 financial crisis now puts its logo on teenagers doing kickflips. Somewhere a risk management committee approved this.
AI data centers require more power than small countries. They cost billions to build. They become obsolete when the next model drops. But Jamie Dimon sleeps fine at night, and now you're supposed to sleep fine too, right before you wire your Roth IRA into a leveraged semiconductor ETF you can't pronounce.
Photo by on Unsplash
Leave a Comment