David McCormick, U.S. Senator from Pennsylvania — yes, that Pennsylvania — has disclosed a purchase of somewhere between half a million and a million dollars in Northampton County general purpose revenue bonds. Five percent coupon. Matures 2034. Filed exactly seven days after the trade, which is, legally speaking, the longest you're allowed to wait before telling anyone.
The bond is backed by Northampton County, Pennsylvania. Not a defense contractor. Not a semiconductor play. Not even a particularly exciting toll road. Northampton County. Population: roughly 330,000 people trying to get through their lives without becoming a congressional portfolio disclosure.
To be clear: a 5% muni bond maturing in 2034 is, objectively, a normal and boring thing to own. It is the financial equivalent of a sensible sedan. There is no obvious scandal here. A sitting Senator bought debt issued by a county he presumably represents, locked in a decent tax-advantaged yield, and disclosed it within the legally required window.
Which is exactly what makes it so disorienting. We've been conditioned. We see "congressional trade disclosure" and our lizard brain starts running pattern recognition. And then it's just… a bond. Northampton County. Matures in nine years.
The chart on this one is a straight line. That's the joke. That's also the appeal.
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