Wealth advisors report that SpaceX millionaires solve their financial problems by writing on whiteboards. Revolutionary stuff. Next they'll tell us these geniuses use calculators.
The same people who claim they're building rockets to Mars can't figure out asset allocation without a dry-erase marker and "troubleshooting." That's what they call it when you realize you have seven million dollars and no idea what a Roth IRA is. Troubleshooting. Engineers love renaming basic incompetence.
Here's what actually happened. Some 28-year-old SpaceX options holder walked into a wealth management office worth nine million dollars and asked if he should put it all in Bitcoin. The advisor handed him a whiteboard marker to shut him up. The kid drew a rocket ship. Called it a diversification strategy. The advisor nodded and charged him forty basis points.
They're using AI too, apparently. Which means ChatGPT is now a fiduciary. Ask it whether you should take the early liquidity event or wait for IPO. It'll give you six paragraphs that sound smart and mean nothing. Perfect. That's exactly what a human wealth advisor does except the AI doesn't wear a Patagonia vest.
The article treats this like innovation. These people have "unique ways of addressing their financial challenges." They draw pictures and ask computers for advice. Unique. Every broke day trader does this except they use TradingView instead of a whiteboard and they're asking the same stupid questions with commas in different places.
The real story is simpler. Smart people who understand orbital mechanics are exactly as clueless about money as everyone else. They just have more of it to lose. The whiteboard won't save them when they YOLO into some private equity meme fund because another rocket engineer said it has good fundamentals.
Wealth advisors love SpaceX clients because they can charge double to explain what a bond is while pretending it's rocket science.
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