Marc Benioff stood in front of a camera and declared the SaaSpocalypse is nonsense. He runs Salesforce. Salesforce sells software subscriptions. Man who sells software subscriptions says software subscriptions will never stop selling. Stunning development.
The SaaSpocalypse theory goes like this: companies bought too much cloud software during the pandemic, realized they were burning cash on tools nobody uses, and started canceling subscriptions faster than a gym membership in February. Benioff says this is wrong. He would know. He checks his bank account daily and the money still arrives.
Retail traders heard "SaaSpocalypse is nonsense" and immediately started Googling which SaaS penny stocks to buy. They will purchase shares in companies that lose money on every customer. They will hold through earnings. They will watch the stock drop forty percent. They will post on Reddit about manipulation. They will never sell. They will die holding bags of enterprise collaboration software that peaked in 2021.
Benioff built a company worth hundreds of billions by convincing other companies they need customer relationship management software. Every salesperson at every firm now logs into Salesforce to update fields nobody reads. Managers generate reports nobody opens. Executives dashboard metrics nobody understands. The system works perfectly.
The real apocalypse is not that SaaS dies. It's that SaaS lives forever. Corporations will pay subscription fees until the sun explodes. They will never cancel. They will never audit usage. They will never ask why they pay six figures annually for software that stores email addresses. Benioff knows this. That's why he's not worried. That's why he never will be. The apocalypse already happened and his side won.
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