Back-to-school costs are squeezing families. Financial journalists have responded by explaining that you can borrow money to buy pencils.
The cheapest way to finance school shopping is apparently not skipping the $80 light-up sneakers your kid will outgrow by November. It's finding the right interest rate on debt you're taking out for folders.
Someone wrote an entire article about this. They got paid real money to tell parents that if you absolutely must borrow cash for a Trapper Keeper, maybe don't use the credit card charging 29% APR. Groundbreaking stuff. Next they'll investigate whether it's cheaper to buy lunch meat on sale.
The technical analysis here is flawless. Families are squeezed. Costs exist. Borrowing costs more when the rate is higher. This is journalism the same way a traffic cone is architecture.
Here's what actually happened: school supplies cost money like they do every August, and some financial outlet needed to hit their monthly quota of articles pretending to help struggling families while serving them a 500-word ad for personal loans. Very helpful. Very noble.
The parents reading this already know they're f*cked. They don't need a breakdown of APR calculations. They need their kid to stop growing or the school district to stop requiring seventy-two glue sticks per child like they're building a papier-mâché replica of the Sistine Chapel.
But sure, let's talk financing options. Maybe take out a HELOC for the TI-84 calculator. Refinance the mortgage for gym shoes. Really leverage up that school supply portfolio.
The funniest part is the word "cheapest" appearing in the same sentence as "borrow." The cheapest way to borrow money is the financial equivalent of asking what's the healthiest way to eat broken glass.
Families are getting squeezed and the media's advice is to pick which vice grip feels most comfortable.
Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash
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