The Noise

877 posts

Sardonic takes on the headlines. No chart left unread.

New here? Start with the Indicator Legend to understand how to read our charts.

The Noise

Jul 09, 2026

CNBC Grades States Like They're Selling You a Timeshare

CNBC's annual study puts all 50 states to the test across 138 metrics and 10 categories of competitiveness. These are America's Top States for Business....

Read More

The Noise

Jul 09, 2026

CEO Announces 90% of New Grid Capacity Comes From People Who Hate Money

Clean power is responsible for roughly 90% of all new electrical capacity being added to the grid, according to the CEO of the American Clean Power Association....

Read More

The Noise

Jul 09, 2026

AI Lobbyists Discover Democracy Has a Buy Now Button

Lawmakers are working on AI legislation — and two major industry PACs are each pushing for their own version of regulation....

Read More

The Noise

Jul 09, 2026

Levi Strauss Announces Denim Still Costs Money

Levi Strauss beat quarterly expectations on the top and bottom lines during its fiscal 2026 second quarter....

Read More

The Noise

Jul 09, 2026

PepsiCo Blames Americans for Not Buying Enough Doritos

PepsiCo reported weaker-than-expected quarterly earnings despite strong international demand....

Read More

The Noise

Jul 09, 2026

Mark Rutte Invents Flattery-Based Defense Policy

NATO chief Mark Rutte lavished praise on U.S. President Donald Trump during a fractious summit in Turkey this week....

Read More

Stay Connected

Featured News

How to Read My Charts — Indicator Legend

How to Read My Charts — Indicator Legend

Jun 21, 2026

The news is noise. The chart is all that matters.

↑

The Noise is free. If Phil's commentary made you laugh or think, he accepts tips. No pressure — the sarcasm was complimentary.