Delta wants you to earn up to 200,000 bonus SkyMiles. All you have to do is open credit cards.
That's the whole deal. Sign up. Spend. Collect miles. Repeat until your credit score looks like a ransom note.
The headline calls the offers "unusually valuable." Unusually valuable to whom? Delta. A company that sells miles to American Express, who sells them back to you, who pays a fee for the privilege. It's a hostage situation where the hostage pays the ransom and thanks the kidnapper for the stimulating conversation.
Then there's the "last chance" part. Last chance for what? These offers rotate like bad lunch specials. There will be another last chance. There is always another last chance. Last chance is the only thing in finance that is never scarce.
The retail trader reads this and sees opportunity. Free flights. Free upgrades. A lifestyle. He pictures himself in Sky Club, sipping a complimentary drink next to a man who actually earned his seat through work.
He will hit the minimum spend by putting his rent on the card. He will forget the annual fee. He will earn 200,000 miles and then discover that Delta decides what a mile is worth, and it changes its mind quarterly. A SkyMile is a currency issued by an airline. Think about that. Then think about what your portfolio looks like.
The summary also mentions "multiple flight certificates." Certificates. Little paper promises that expire. You will hold three of them and use none, like a man who buys a gym membership as a form of prayer.
Delta will take your money, your data, and your hope. In return you get to board in Group 9 with a smile.
Congratulations on your 200,000 miles. Your dignity was already in a lower fare class.
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