Jamieson Greer disclosed financial assets. The country reacted as if he'd confessed to running a Ponzi scheme out of a food truck. He reported between $1.17 million and $3.75 million in holdings. That's a range wider than most retail traders' understanding of what a limit order does.
Greer made over $650K at his law firm. A lawyer earned money practicing law. Stop the f*cking presses. He also took ten grand from Coupang at some point. Coupang is a Korean e-commerce company. Nobody cared about Coupang yesterday. Nobody will care tomorrow. But today every dipsh*t with a Robinhood account thinks this matters for their Tesla calls.
The disclosure lists assets as a range because that's how government forms work. They don't ask for exact numbers. They ask for brackets. This prevents nobody from doing anything. It exists so congressional staffers can pretend they read things.
Greer now runs trade policy. His job involves tariffs and negotiations with countries that actually manufacture products. Whether he has $1.17 million or $3.75 million changes none of this. The yen doesn't give a sh*t about his Schwab account. The euro is not monitoring his cash position. China is not adjusting export quotas based on whether his net worth rounds up or down.
Retail traders will scan this headline for trade war signals. They'll find none. Then they'll buy semiconductor stocks anyway because someone on Twitter said the word "chips" and they got hungry.
Greer reported higher cash holdings than his previous disclosure. He converted assets to cash. Probably because he took a government job and needed liquidity. Revolutionary stuff. Really moving markets here. The S&P 500 closed unchanged because even algorithms know better than to trade on this.
The Coupang payment will spawn seventeen conspiracy theories by morning, each dumber than the last, all written by people who think Korea and China are the same place.
Photo by Frolicsome Fairy on Unsplash
Leave a Comment